found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
its 10 pm and i am cleaning vomit off the ceiling. i am nowhere near drunk enough for this to be funny.
so he came in me this morning and i was like WTF DUDE. i called him Daddy until he agreed to pay the full $40 for plan B. He wants to name our Patrick because it will be a st pattys day baby. absolutely NOT.
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
I have Denny's hours of operations written on the palm of my hand....not in my writing, in a girls writing, is that as good as or equal to a cell number?
i think the theme of this summer is "shitting in weird locations."
You told me you had two boobs that want to be naked for me. I'm just following up on your request.
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
You were mean to me and you broke my heart and hurt my feelings. You dont get to talk to me about Peter Dinklage
Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.
I can't believe you cupped pat's balls to prove your fake relationship
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
How are you and the lady friend?
Well, she's a lunatic, and I love sex, so we're good.
Randomize
