But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
the drag queen on stage looks like shes wearing the EXACT same dress i wore 2 senior prom.
i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
My financial advisor pointed out that 37% of my income is currently going towards "non-essential food items"
That's banker lingo for "you're an alcoholic"
According to google history I spent most of last night trying to buy an elephant.
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
Cops busted the party. A kid dressed as a dinosaur tried to crawl out the bathroom window but his tail got stuck. It took 3 cops to pry him out.
Let me know when ur ready so I can throw up one last time then brush my teeth
Having my alarm go off at 3:30 makes me wanna rip my dick off and shove it through my eye socket
Need you on the dancefloor. Hungry and lonely.
His water bottle is sitting on my coffee table like a monolith dedicated to the things he is not doing to my vagina.
I just want it to be said that I had sex in my Belle dress last night. Classy motherfucker.
I must be really high or they really did just bring me a banana split instead of a burger
You know it was a good dinner party when one of the guests broke their finger and no one can remember how it happened.
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