She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
Grilled cheese is the best thing. ever. better than boys, and alcohol, and sex, and chocolate, and money. But not really the last two.
Her mom caught her drunk streaking when she was 12. Of course she's perfect for me.
By midnight I was dipping doritos in frosting...that's how my simmer break diet is going.
She bit me. She gave me a brief pity cuddle. I gave her an awkward backrub, somehow I thought it would be a good idea to include the vagina in that. It wasn't.
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
Bloody Mary Monday just took a turn for the worst... Just had a heart to heart talk with the cat about it's obsession with chewing on cardboard.... Time for a nap.
Black out Jordan is making huge strides. I didn't even pee on anyone or anything last night.
There's scrapes on the inside of both my thighs.. Because we wanted to get drunk and climb trees naked.
Wanna show up on a guy's doorstep and punch him in the balls for me? At least this one isn't a cop.
Her alarm in the morning was Best Day Ever from Spongebob. I'm have lots of conflicting feelings right now...
You just gave me the title for the series of our lives. Haha. Chapter 12: the cocaine on the back of the hairbrush
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
I love her so much I can forgive her for wearing crocs
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
Randomize
