You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
i was blowing him and "what if god was one of us" came on his playlist. I had to leave
she said, and i quote, "i want to black out with my rack out"
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
I tried to sit on a barstool last night...it was an open trashcan.
I can say with 87% certainty that i received one of the world's five greatest blow jobs since the Coolidge administration on Saturday night.
You motherfucker. I just had an MRI with a penny under my boob.
Sorry about coming to the pool in only a thong. I thought you said it was closed. Not that you were teaching a group of kids how to swim.
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
I think the blind guy i flirt with on a regular basis is starting to realize he's old enough to be my father. I can't tell if he's into it or not.
how I know last night was a good night: this morning I found a bottle of tapatio, a bag of chicken and a bag of popcorn in my purse.
How drunk you think somebody has to be, that they think that putting out a profile pic like that can be even a slightly good idea?
I drank all the wines... and all th Doritos. Whilst watching Fat Camp. I need to reassess my values.
He fucked the hangover right out of me. That good.
im gonna miss him. and by him, i mean his dick
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