This is the first month I have not taken plan B to get my period in over a year
And somehow that makes me sad knowing I haven't had raunchy unprotected sex in a month
i learned a valuable lesson last night. sometimes nice girls finish first. twice.
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
I got to find out the airplane alcohol limit, and somehow I made it through the flight.
guy in front of me at the pharmacy just asked the pharmacist for 2 Plan B's and replied with, "If your wondering, then yes I did have a threesome. It was amazing".
future-me showed up mid trip and gave us a thumbs up.
He was having a "party in the princess castle." At what point do I blindfold him and take him to AA?
It's called "lets see how many European capitals we can do the walk of shame through in one year"
I think I'm gonna quit partying for awhile. Piercing my own nose is where I draw the line.
in the future when you find clothing in your street, just assume it's mine.
We go out, we get drunk, we watch Star Wars, we pass out. What's wrong with this tradition?
Got paid 100 bucks to babysit a kid for five hours while hungover. I slept the whole time and threw up twice. Yes 100 bucks.
I'm just to the point my give a fucks is so far in the red that I'm going to have to take out a 30yr loan of fucks to repay it
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
She's better-looking with the mask on.
Randomize
