...seriously? chocolate pudding? motorboating? No one has even done that to ME and i am 69 times the whore you are
I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
There's a person in my phone named motor boat. I love making new friends.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well you know it's going to be an interesting night when the bathroom attendant is doing hail marrys
how are you shocked you fucked her? sure shes hot, but she also washed your beerpong balls in her mouth..... you should probably get tested.
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
An old man just slapped my ass and handed me five dollars while I was filling chips at subway. I feel violated, but that was the easiest five dollars I've ever made.
yeah, I don't think I'm getting into the baseball game tonight. The security guard definitely saw me bowl over that child.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ok, i suppose pissing your pants could be considered a wardrobe malfunction.
He literally said I should watch game of thrones while I was blowing him like is this the conversation you want to be having right now
I just handed a girl a slice of pizza and she handed me her number. Is this how Vegas hookups normally begin?
Someone has big plans this weekend. Just went to throw away the trash and saw packaging for 3 different vibrators on the top of the stack
I'm shaving my vagina to the lion king soundtrack. How's your 9am?
so then the cop took one last hit off our blunt and then drove off in his car and we just all stood there thinking, yea... that just happened...
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