so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
I'm like a warm blanket that has sex with you
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
But I was triple fisting doubles, that's bound to be a good time. Might have a broken collarbone though.
I was getting sick from all the peanut butter I had to lick off
Stop bitching. YOU SHOULD FEEL BLESSED TO HAVE LICKED PEANUT BUTTER OFF OF THESE TOTTERS
The best part is every argument that she makes from here on out will be refuted by "Oh hey remember that time you shit yourself wearing someone else's sweatpants at a frat party?"
AFTER I licked the bald guys head they told me we weren't playing
I drew you a picture of Jesus holding hands with Frida Kahlo as a token of my gratitude
I asked him to make me two boxes of macaroni and cheese. That's like eight servings. How did I think that was an okay amount.
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
Power lunch with dad, pain pills and tequila shots. Dad does Monday hard.
we watched a guy take a shot of tequila while riding a unicycle
Dude just saw some some guy puke out of a car window on the highway going to school.
Can’t fucking wait for Tuesday night. Have another situation that popped up. I swear my life is like a cross between a soap opera and a porno
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