i found a roscoes card in my pocket that says 'fuck me bare fo $15.20'. Wow
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
I picked her up for our first date on a fucking horse. Of course I got a BJ.
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
And your cousins porn shouldn't have been the first straight porn you watched. And for that I am sorry
Ugh I hate you, and the responsible adult life I pretend to have during daylight hours
Heat not working dressed like an eskimo. A real one with a ski sock on my junk
Both guys that I'm dating were waiting for me in the parking lot after work. Literally the most awkward situation I have ever been in
He called me 'pal' while complimenting how well I took his load on my face. I've officially been fuckbuddy-zoned.
He literally said, while inside me, "I would smack your ass but I don't want to wake my mom up". Amazing.
Her name was Danica but I felt like it would be hard to say drunk so I called her Shelby
Randomize
