As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
if you don't go to jail tommorow I'll buy you a 40. Motivation.
God dammit, you have a cape and I don't even have a fucking jacket.
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
This should be a warning to men everywhere: do not send pictures of your erect penis to women you hardly know - they will add cats and send them to all of their friends.
Let's be honest. I make up for my well below average sized penis with a great personality and a possibly successful future
We just taught the Brazilian how to smoke out of a vuvuzela.
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
Yeah when we were together he never sent me dick pics like a normal boyfriend. It was always pizzas. That should've been my sign.
OMG -- There are strippers in the bathroom crying because their power moves aren't good enough to win the competition
I'm sorry I threw a frog in your car last night.
I got locked into my place today. You might be wondering if that was a typo... It's not.
I’ll call you in a minute. Trying to book an AirBnB so I can finally bang the yummy guy from yoga
Your downward dog is going to rock his cock. I’m jealous
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