ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
is it odd that your cat looks tougher than you?
Her gag reflex was as absent as a father figure must have been in her childhood
You lit the bowl with a rolled up paper towel that you ignited on the stove.
i'm so sad bro, I can't get any pussy. I'm so sad
I think I just fucked my first person born during the Clinton administration
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
I just saw a wasted dude crawl out of the road at 2 in the afternoon. Big question- still drunk from the weekend or hitting the soju already?
I puked on myself in front of a customer. all. over. myself. thanks Saturday nights
Exactly. Some of us want to get married. And some of us want to wear sombreros and do cocaine. To each their own.
I learn from experience and I experienced what it would be like to completely lose my mind and then wake up with a stab wound.
See, remember when you wanted to get an Ashley Madison account and I told you not to and you hated me? You. Are. Welcome.
How my distance relationship is going: he's trying to sext me & I'm stuffing pizza in my face.
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
Randomize
