dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
i know! what is this dateline?
i can't believe i had my finger in that
she was like a sexier Rosie O'Donnel
It's my birthday, I plan on masturbating and boating, maybe even masturbate on the boat.
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Got kicked out of the baseball game with a 4 officer escort. Not bad for a monday night.
she just built a cabin out of hotdogs and cooked it in the microwave.
now she is shaking the plate and mumbling "this is what california must feel like"
This morning two of his housemate threw confetti over me, started singing and handed me a make shift trophy out of cereal boxes and beer cans that said 'Harry's Virginity' on it. Fucking brilliant!
He just tagged everyone he's slept with this year in a 'memories of 2011' tweet
im suggesting it to him. and by suggesting i mean we're not having sex again unless im wearing high heels
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The security guard popped his head over the mens room door and goes "nice tits- now get out." Deer in headlights moment right there.
No just a slight sexual miscommunication which led to a little (lot) vomiting by one party and a bruised sternum on the other party involved.
I can't even make a guess how that goes.
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
I also woke up on my floor. Naked. On a pile of clothes. With my head in the trash can. And a sheet over me.
He talked for 3 hours straight on how his dad is a dentist how fuck do you think my night was
apparently while i was high i thought that putting a dinosaur temporary tattoo on my inner thigh would keep me from taking my pants off and having sex with him...