No period for spring break; use this wisely.
her cat watched me eat her out... I would use the alternate term for both of those things but it's too weird.
Im dating a 38 year old who's lap I can fit in. Tell me I don't have daddy issues.
I creeped him on fb. I'm about 90% sure I just blew him in the same tux he wore for his wedding..
you really need to remember next time not to write your name and phone number on the paper its wrapped in.
But what if it got lost?
its illegal. you dont want people to contact you if they find it.
You made out with him a lot. Almost as much as you told everyone Paul was the zamboni guy.
Why did I ever allow that penis to enter my sacred temple?
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
Being responsible doesn't make memories.
I told him you forbid me to sleep with him so he needs to accept that.
There I was, puking into the toilet, and he was rubbing my feet, buck naked. I feel like a drunk Disney princess.
Next time I pee on a car, I'll text you.
this strobe light makes my body turn on and off
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
dude me and this dog are gonna go bond oon the tramplene with stromboli... i think everyone is staring at me... being this high is SO stressful
Randomize
