oh so you have enough money for the third eye blind concert but not enough for the morning after pill?
I brought my laptop into the bathroom so I can facebook while vomiting. New low?
If he really loved his girlfriend then he'd wear a condom when he fucks me.
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
I'd like to thank you fucktards for dumping the WHOLE box of Tricuits in my bed after I passed out.
I'm worried my skin won't stretch enough to handle this boner. Then what?
KNEE DEEP IN HOES. SEND HELP.
We couldve played the bring a random boy to lunch game but i made him go home
I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
I kinda took a step back after our "surprise bottles night"
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
I just found out that there's a bar that has happy hour at 12 pm. It's like the universe doesn't want me to be sober
there's a giant awkward home-wrecking elephant in the room. and its name is meg.
Randomize
