I'm watching harry potter...good thing I already know I'm gay
so then you didnt wanna fuck tonight right?
oops, you werent supposed to get that until you left.
After I just paid $211 for my hair to be dyed and cut this guy at the bar said "I know you died your hair with koolaid, but I'd still fuck the shit out of you"
I can't get a boner in the bathroom of a buffet.
Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered
She was standing in the road flagging traffic in a tshirt and boxers. I didn't stop.
All she wanted was a cigarette
Mom just posted ur drunk pix from Cancun in the newly made "My not-so-fantastic son" album. Thought you should know.
Only catch is you have to sleep in the same bed as me. But no worries, I plan on being in a random guys hotel room every night. So it's essentially yours.
I feel like I'm pretty optimistic for a girl that might be pregnant.
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
Nothing like being naked and confused and clutching a scented candle...at least I woke up in my own bed though.
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
Randomize
