You screamed 'pound me, you big thick stud.' I looked around for porn cameras.
Shut up. I did not.
I really wish I was making that up.
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
I dont know, but the way you were flopping around and gurgling made me scared that you were actually drowning in the carpet.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My dick was almost in plain McDonald's sight
i spent my morning giving relationship advice to the kid i had sex with on a kitchen table this weekend
he just kept texting even after we lit his shoelaces on fire. he just calmly walked into the pool... still texting.
Is it inappropriate to be Drs. Willy Fister and Jess Hewill as a couples costume for Halloween?
Oh we're gynecologists
you were holding her above your head singing Circle of Life in what i assume was a Simba reference. then she smacked her head on a bar light and the bouncers kicked you out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's amazing the amount I can accomplish with a glass of wine in my hand.
Apparently calling shotgun while getting put into a police car is frowned upon
They found you popping and locking it alone in the parking lot
Im sorry you'll never get the feeling of closeness when you go to pee outside and you realize you're peeing right where someone else just peed
My sex toys have been held in customs for almost a month now. They're British, what the hell?!?
wtf why is there glitter all over my dog
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