U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
Am I allowed to make my facebook status "loves farting in chairs"? I think it would shock every boy that I am friends with.
I used the lotion his mom gave me for christmas to give him a hand job. It felt so wrong.
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
you said candy land and then passed out.
ps. we found your stash in the candyland game. Thanks.
Dude. Cab ride home consisted of me making out with an Asian girl sitting next to my Dad
its before 9am and ive already had to dip my dick and balls in a glass of milk. probably isnt a good sign for how today is going to go.
When we were done he got down next to the bed and I thought he was Tebowing. He was hitting a bong that he had already loaded and hidden under the bed.
Aaaaand my mom is wearing jeggings...
my entire left arm went numb
you need to get that checked to make sure you're not wired to have strokes instead of orgasms
Our drunk hook up was interrupted by the delivery guy. When he came back to my room we ate the gyros and went back to sex like we didn't take a lunch break.
The CEO is puking on the sidewalk and the HR director just offered me coke. Engineers have the best parties
He and I didn't so much date, as watch cartoons and go down on each other.
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
Randomize
