ok, im coming! i just found some lemon square in my bangs, washing that out..this shit is all over me! was i in a pie eating contest?
yes
did i win? did you like my outfit? or should i change, if you were horny would you bang me?
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
Been drinkin since 3, wearing a tutu, how could things go wrong
I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
At a pool hall. Dudes walkin around with fuzzy handcuffs cuffed to his belt. The douche bag level grows higher still
The preggo girl brought her pet chipmunk to class today. fyi.
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
She made me take my shoes off outside her room but she didn't make me wear a condom. I am confused.
Screw them and thier engaged asses. I've got liquor to drink and boys I don't know to make out with.
nothin like your phone freezing up and sending out old booty calls at 11am on a sunday. fml.
Just stuck all that extra cocaine money we made in a savings account...like a responsible adult..
Look at the picture I MADE him take with me...like why??? He's holding my foot?
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
Bro, she said she wanteo to fuck me with my white Nike cap on so I resemble a douchebag. I think my choice of women might be coming into question
I have a hickey in my new work ID photo.....
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