I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
Last night I saw a drag queen take a shot of Red Hot that was soaked into a tampon. I fucking love my life!
she looked like the before picture.
I thought I had fell out of his trailer but he says I tried to ninja kick his TV stand saying those girls hula hooping were trying to seduce him. There wasn't anyone else there.
I just witnessed someone getting head in the parking garage. Don't ever tell me Baylor is too conservative again.
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
Tonight just feels like one of those I'm going to lose a shoe nights.
Watching the tv in the reflection of my phone cause I'm too hungover to roll over.... Yes it is 4 PM...
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
We're gonna have screwdrivers in a cab at 4am?
Is that weird?
Wait, tell the rest at happy hour. I wanna be able to interrupt you with my loud cackles and stupid questions.
If so I'm coming over there. There's no way I'm having "hello, how are you" conversations with my neighbors on acid
i'm sitting in bed scratching my boobs and wearing a sparkly fedora and have no one to blame but myself
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
Randomize