Her vagina felt like a horse was eating an apple out of my hand..
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
i swear to god even though i took those meds before coming here i did not hallucinate zulema silently throwing up into a breakfast burrito
We stayed up until 4:20 AM. The next thing I remember was waking up at 4 PM, like my internal alarm clock knew.
I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
I'm drawing the line at your vagina. I will not accompany you to get that pierced and/or tattooed. There's got to be some mystery to our relationship.
He sent me a snapchat of himself growing a double chin. I think we're past the stage where there's any risk of us sleeping together. Ever.
Woke up with a 6lb bucket of Redvines with a note that said "I'm sorry" care to explain?
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
Our office went out together for the first time to celebrate the fact our coworker got fired.
"Fwd: Nice to meet you last night thanks for the tit flash" no recollec. i am officially banned from wearing tube tops to the bar.
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
Next thing I know her tits are out on my desk. It was straight out of a porno. What was I supposed to do I’m not made of stone
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