New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
May have finally hit rock bottom...bouncer from the strip club informed me I wore the same shirt last night
worst. lesbian. ever. i'm not sure she knows a clit from a pencil eraser.
I just peed on my pajamas. Its gonna be a long night. Don't forget the cookies.
He hid IN a snowbank for 2 hours waiting for me to come home. This game has to stop before someone dies.
I jumped on his cock in 2 seconds flat. Thanks mom for sending me to gymnastics when I was a kid.
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
Just watched my entire extended family eat salad out of the bowl i threw up in last night.
He is 30 (that's 8 years older than I am) and uses more Emojis than I do. Problem?
As my straight cousin I need you to answer a question. Are the Astros a baseball team, and if so, are they good? This is flirting related and time-sensitive.
The crowd is chanting "we want sex!" There's a man dressed as bacon. That is all
I just found your ripped underwear on my chandelier. Care to explain?
I was in a penguin suit. Dick out. I am confident in the value of my pic.
I love waking up to reeses ice cream. But I DONT love waking up to it all over my cat. I blame you.
Randomize
