This is your typical "sorry i got drunk and tried to seduce you into having sex while you were throwing up" text.
haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
I wish there was a hungover fairy to brush my teeth and bring me a diet coke.
he sent me a winky sad face. i cannot deal this level of pathetically needy flirtatiousness.
You kept apologizing for not offering me some of your Whisky, which you referred to as "Jesus Nectar".
and then she started to quack like a duck and u started throwing bread at her
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
What can i say, i'm an artist. I think deep thoughts. In between the homoerotica and pterodactyl noises
Because it was 5am and I had a shitty mixed drink and I was threatening to put my balls in your face.
Not the worst first impression I've experienced.
If we had kids we couldn't come home, get high and watch porn together. And that's like the only reason I get up in the morning
I'm sorry I put my balls through your watch. On another note your roommate had them on his shoulder too sry
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
Nothing like being naked and confused and clutching a scented candle...at least I woke up in my own bed though.
I thought I needed to get laid. Turns out I just needed pasta.
I just got fed by 3 guys. I love my job.
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