It was like a spaceship landed and 1000s of hipsters filled up the park
is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
Its official. I've reentered slutty territory. I was a condom away from having sex in a childs playhouse at a park. Oh and I lost my car keys.
Im just a social blackout drinker.
I just realized that there are baby oil soaked hand prints on the wall over my bed. Last night was a good night.
If she doesn't judge me for bringing my vibrator in the tanning bed, I know she is a true friend.
We thought we were getting kicked out but then he started tickling the bouncer. Next thing you know the bouncers giving him a piggy back ride to the bar.
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
Oh my god I peed in a park last night and then tried to set off fireworks with a group of middle-aged men
5am, I am wayy too drunk for this. Hookers came out of nowhere. They're like ninjas. Some poor soul got the fat one, tomorrow's going to be interesting...
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
When he swipes my v card it will be comparable to my bat mitzvah. should I make sweatshirts or sweatpants?
Can I join you for some emotional "Post: The Ohio State University's first lose in football after a 24 game winning streak" sex?
Just sent my mother the text "we need to get our vaginas looked at this thursday". Hows your day going?
I just watched my ex butt chug a quart of eggnog. Why did I dump her again?
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