I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
once the tequila comes in everyone elses feelings go out the window.
I met him yesterday and now he's wanting to hold hands and kiss in public. i hate this
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I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
We're trying to leave but amy's hitting on the guy who mans the nacho cart
so... the fat chick just walked over, shook my hand, then introduced herself as "versatile". shoot me now.
It just goes to show you, your dreams can come true. You can hook up with your dads hot married friend.
Whenever I'm hungover I try to stay in public as much as possible, hoping to be a cautionary tale to children. It's a public service, really.
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Our Tuesday night drunk Irish step dancing was on point tonight.
Don't Richard Nixon her vagina
Ate 5 hotdogs today. You need to get me back on my tequila diet cause this shit has to stop!
I never thought I'd end up with a prison pen pal through tinder
I just took a shot before my midterm. Gotta keep things in perspective.
I do have a moral compass! I can’t help it if it only points at penises
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