well we can cross tagging a chick in a movie theatre off the list of things to do before we die
This house was built for laser tag.
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
Like. I probably should fuck him. I owe him for breaking his thumb.
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
I haven't even booked my flights yet and I have my drug supply sorted
I've had more jaegerbombs than I can count on 3 fingers
I sent him a tit pic on accident and he replied with "nice ass"
They are going to name an STD after you.
My bail money is reserved for people I either A, think were in the right, or B, have an awesome story that leads up to needing it. Just remember that before you call me.
I'm sorry that running around town like a frenetic wombat trying to find you KY jelly isn't good enough for you.
I'm not asking for life coaching, I'm just asking if you know where I left my underpants.
Man, I'm never going tanning again he noticed the burns on my ass
Fuck you bitch. You're married. You got a live-in dick at home for your needs. I still gotta surf this shitty town's bars for cock
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