I'm in a room alone pouting because I got the wrong nachos at taco bell.
I had to go to the bank to confirm purchases made on 10/31/09 because they were signed as Lady Gaga
the more i look through evidence of last night, the less i seem to remember.
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
You then proceeded to tell me how good of a cook you were and put raw cookie dough in the champagne.
New carpet is nice. I'm making carpet angels. Like a fresh snowfall.
my grandpa is going down the line on this prom picture, and telling me how big everyone's nipples are... he was spot on for me.
Just found an unopened tied g of coke on the floor in her room... she thinks the maintenance guy dropped it earlier today. This takes the cake for sketchiest apartment.
WHO THE FUCK TAGS THEMSELVES AT COUNTY JAIL?!?!
We left his house because I forgot how to drink water, I was just holding it in my mouth and then spitting it out, needless to say I don't remember the sex.
We should discuss this later when sobriety has returned. Right now he's just like a distant cousin.
My life hurts
I woke up 30 minutes away from the bar, my car was at a train station, and when I got home all I got was the speechless head shake
Also food confession I ate an entire bag of starburst jelly beans today. and a plan B. All around think I hit all my nutrients
I was trying to sext but got a notification that my dad and professor both commented on my Facebook photo. Bad timing.
what do you mean he's functionally heterosexual
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