This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
I just told her she was a heartbeat above a blowup doll.
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
I think I have vodka in my lungs
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
ROOF CAVED IN, WE'RE GUNNA MAKE A WATERSLIDE
Woke up this morning buried in a mountain of chex mix and bubble wrap. We must have been doing something great last night
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
Like I've never seen her that drunk. She's usually like quiet and doesn't say she'll fuck someone on a futon
Lmao I should put that ad on Craigslist "in need of muscular and determined team of men to carry drunken birthday whore safely home"
You also once spent an entire hour explaining the origin of the strip steak to me.
Dude I'm so clean right now. Like I feel insulted that I can pass a piss test.
So from zero to dumpster fire, how shitty do you feel this morning? I'm hovering somewhere around trainwreck.
I don't know what that means. Any of it. BUT I will be at your house at 10:20 and you better be ready to get high as balls.
I noticed it at one point and thought do I really wanna bang the guy with the phone holster .....of course I do
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