3:40 am: you never wrote back on my facebook wall
She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
She told me to stuff her like a turkey. She actually yelled happy thanksgiving.
Where is my rescue team. I keep hiding shit. And I'm trying to give out shots of olive oil
Im just a social blackout drinker.
Its not that I'm getting free haircuts... Its just that she is paying for sex with haircuts...
Weekday college schedule so far: get high as tits. Watch Family Guy marathons. Repeat.
I decided they need a food cart that just roams around the library like the cotton candy people at the circus. But with real food. like tacos cause it sounds delicious.
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
I love it. Like, more than my penis at the moment.
Donald Trump and I would be so adorably orange together!
Nobody knows who they are, but they have an ice luge so they are welcome in my book
You know you're hung over when the glare from the cream cheese on your bagel is just too bright...
Btw...refried beans is a terrible thing to throw up.
When are you getting back?
Well google maps doesn't have an estimated time for crawling... Could be days
Randomize
