I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
My cousin's wedding had personal beer funnels for each table and a drinking game against the bride and groom. im sorry for ever calling you white trash
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
He thought the strainer was a giant bowl to puke in.
I'm still not completely convinced I'm not pregnant. I just dipped beef jerky in cream cheese frosting.
not sure if I should be concerned that my brother just stormed into my room and looked at me with a serious face and said, "I'm a peacock, you have to let me fly." oh, vicodin...
We need a hype man... Like a DMX type dude to just up the ante constantly...
I'm actually pinning crap for Friendsgiving like a boss right now. These bitches better show up.
She was wearing American flag underwear. How could I NOT fuck her?
You're a true patriot.
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
Nothing like walk of shaming to the bus stop in your bar clothes at noon and seeing the fire truck you work on drive past with the other shift giving you thumbs up.. Brotherhood at its finest
I seriously just rolled a joint on my high school diploma. I feel like I've come so far.
Drunk me says 72 hours of Mexican Viagra and room service.Sober me says we stopped being lovers for a reason after the last lost weekend.
Leave it to my mom and I to turn the hearing into a drinking game.
Randomize
