lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
I think the phrase "bag of smashed assholes" describes it best
I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
I didn't know it was possible to make picking up dog shit look sexy.
She did the bend and snap...
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
someone just drove by blasting livin on a prayer and threw like 6 bagels out the window... was it you?!
Now I'm at the gym and I never want to leave. It's a combo of adderall and endorphins and I don't want it to go away
its 4am. im standing over him in my bed eating chinese food, on the phone with dan trying to convince him to break up with his gf. whoredom.
He stumbled into my room, flopped on my bed, shoes on my pillow and asked me for a juice box. Then fell asleep with the juice box on his forehead.
I saw that you sent me a photo and the first thing out of my mouth was "I swear if it's another photo of a dick poking out of a bubble bath"
My vagina is screaming your name . Wtf did you do to it
you know i have almost 1500 fb friends but not ONE drunk booty call?
I still can't believe I was army crawling thru his backyard at 2am..
ugh i want to get waxed but I’m afraid. my vagina has had enough trauma this week, i don’t know if I can put her thru any more.
I got fucked in a bat mobile this morning. Being slutty rules.
Randomize
