I think a homeless person took a bath in my mouth while I was sleeping :(
If I were trying to take advantage of you I would have maxed out all your credit cards by now.
If it has a penis then it will be stupid. Just how it works.
You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
A-plus on my thesis. I deserve the blowjob to end all blowjobs. And I wanna wear a crown while you do it.
Jenny was looking for something soft to drink since it's only noon, she chose spiced rum. Think she might die today
did we decide the 'sorry about the threesome' cake was too flippant?
I feel like i could break down a fucking wall with this boner
Soooo, coming over soon?
Has my life seriously led me to day drinking on a Monday the third week of the semester?
It's after 5, it's not day drinking.
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
My brother just text me asking if I was ready for the blowjob of my life.
I asked him if we were going to get arrested for doing it in the bar parking lot. "Absolutly not" said the guy getting the blow job...
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
I could be the Kenny Powers of Sex Therapists.
Randomize
