Walk of Shame. In a state park.
Don't forget your talking to the guy who got arrested for throwing beads back at the Mardi Gras floats. You can't deny that's a first, and neither could that cop.
Working out to an exercise video on OnDemand. Also, drinking beer and eating cream cheese with a side of bagel in between stretches.
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
the theme of the baby shower is Nightmare On Prego Street
i shall enjoy my approximately 2 hours of being sober today
He had to carry me to the car. But then sat with me and waited for me to sober up enough to have sex. He's a keeper.
No im just getting a road beer. You got my pants?
I may have to marry her. She is smarter than me and has a six figure job and doesn't want to have kids. All I have to be is a trophy husband.
I was grossed out that all their candles smelled like vagina and then I remembered where my fingers had been.
My penis is saying yes, several less important organs are saying noo...
it was like teleporting. everytime i opened my eyes, i was somewhere different... usually the floor.
What's goes good with Everclear?
Pepto-Bismol and a sandwich.
It was somewhere in between an airport security patdown and a medical examination. No groping or squeezing, just brief pokes and pats.
Woke up, bank account is empty. Sock is still full of blood. Nothing in my pockets but a wireless mic and jenga pieces.
Randomize
