Hey, what are you up to?
Drinking wine with the guys and watching 7 Pounds.
Looking back I guess I could have changed that to beer and Die Hard.
Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
its 9am. i just got home. spent 6 hours blowing him in a closet last night
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
I projectile vomited in his sisters room where the toiled would have been if it were the bathroom.
I'd rather blow Nickelback than be told he gave me gonorrhea. I'd even post it on Facebook for all of the world to like, share, and judge me.
I'LL COME GET YOU. GOTTA FIND A SUIT THAT COVERS TIT BRUISES FIRST.
Matt and I's climactic adventure has ended with Matt being hauled off to jail. And now his brother and I are having lunch and a beer.
That guy was cool until he tried fighting that dude in the bow tie. I need better wingmen.
Definitely the only person to buy 2 handles a 2 bottles of champagne & 3 thirties while wearing a fanny pack
Oh god. Charles just fell off the bar. Didn't spill his drink. He's come so far..
You looked at the bouncer while you pissed on the front door of the bar and said...who the fuck are you?
Ugh I realized he only responds to my snaps when I’m eating a popsicle
Why are male brains so small?
He's hot, clean, can actually cook, and best of all isn't a narcissistic prick. I found a unicorn.
Ride that fucker.
Randomize
