I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
I seem to have left my pride at pride
He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
I understand that I gave you a nose bleed with a cheeto last night and for that I apologize
Last night I dipped into my beer fund to pay for groceries. SINCE WHEN ARE MY PRIORITIES SO WHACK???
She told me that as long as she kept starring at the freckle on her arm she wouldnt throw up
Not enough clothes on. Not enough vagina. Not enough drugs in my body.
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
Yeah dude. Pulled out the couch and a bird flew at me. Please tell me who put a bird in my house.
He was rocking just a diaper, shoes, and a gun. Sadly, I would still hit it.
Pornhub is still operational. Therefore, the world has NOT come to an end in the blizzard!
Would you like to get an apartment bong? It can be like our pet and we can give it a name.
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
She’s super into those renaissance faires. But, if you can’t actually stab anyone, what’s the point?
Randomize
