no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
i'm sorry if your life is a sore subject
I think I need to stop sleeping with him. Sex with him is just a reminder of the mediocrity of the rest of my life.
we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
We found a swing set....it's in the front yard.
As the guy I'm having sex with on the side I shouldn't ask you how to dump my boyfriend. But you are the most emotionally detached person I know.
She pulled a wad of lint out of my bellybutton while she was blowing me. Said she's never seen anything like it. I've never gone soft so fast.
somehow this turned into a costume party you have to get here now with my banana suit or I'm wearing my birthday suit
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
The waitress asked if you wanted white or brown, and you said "Isn't it all the same color when it's toasted?". She stared at you for about 20 seconds before she decided that you weren't fucking with her.
im not trying to sound dramatic, but im covered in microwavable lasagna
It's not a walk of shame if you run
He made her leave because she liked Top-Ramen better than Maruchaun. He's my hero.
I wish I may, I wish I might, get some daddy dick tonight
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
Randomize