Do 'mystery' cracked ribs heal any quicker than regular ones?
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
Dude in front of me just jumped out of line at Starbucks to go puke. Vegas in prime form.
Honestly the war on drugs is dumb and you can just sleep in my bed which is mega comfortable anytime you want. There I said it
I've discovered the best way to avoid rehab is to not fuck fat chicks when your drunk, therefore delaying regrets and rock bottom
your the Dr. Phil in my life
Today is an unchanging day
This hurricane was the perfect excuse to buy 2 pounds of animal crackers and a case of beer. It's on Sandy.
Did you seduce any young men into coming home to your love nest of poutine and jäger bombs?
Siri makes being stoned even easier. I don't even Have to type my texts myself
Though I typed a half of that one
She's not a foreskin expert like you
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
I didn't want to have shaved for no reason, so I told him I'd blow him if he would just come over and appreciate the smoothness of my legs.
I dont remember you getting a condom thrown at you. I think I had a concusion
Please tell me im imagining that i claimed that i was king of the ducks.
I told him to not try to hang out with me ever again and now I regret it Bc im bleeding through my uterus and just want him to suck on my aching nipples
Randomize
