she's like the human form of herpes, as soon as you think she's gone for good you have another out break.
i have a real life question, do ur boyfriends pretend to be vampires ever?
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
I just woke up in a puddle of boob sweat. Definitely time to consider a reduction.
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
btw he is cheating on one twin with the other. the main woman in his life has a mullet. I defiantly have either the coolest or weirdest uncle ever
You could probably play six degrees of separation of my cock in this city.
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
Not sorry that my walk of shame this morning was barefoot on my scooter.
Only you would have to block the fucking governor of Tennessee from reading your tweets
Just checked my voicemails on the work phone on speaker. Thank you so much for the one of you screaming "COME FUCK ME NOWWWW!" my boss loved it ..
i woke up at 4 pm face down on my hardwood living room floor. i would say its a new low but i think I found my new napping spot
She invited us over for cocaine and donuts
Tell me again why we had to Facebook stalk your therapist?
Not having a reliable dick in is getting expensive. I’ve had to replace 3 vibrators since Mike and I split up
Randomize
