I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
She's like the female version of the Momento guy. She keeps forgetting that I'm an asshole after we have sex.
It was weird to see you drinking wine out a glass instead of a red cup today
Thats how high i was. The fact that he looked like Seth Rogan was apparently a good thing.
over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read?
at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
Im sitting alone watching titanic. Drunk. Without pants. Holding a fishing pole. Im pretty sure im okay with all of this.
you kept thanking chef boyardee for having pull tab cans
IM PICKING UP BLOW FOR US STOP WHINING ABOUT SEX
Yay for living on the edge. I'm trying this new thing where I stop mom-arming people and promote bad decisions. It's working quite well.
When i'm home next we need to get baked and go to waffle house. I want to see if the waitress can still guess my intoxication level and what i'm about to order before i even make it to the table.
you went to ralph's and bought all of their pears and left them outside my house
About 98% sure I just walked by some dude jerking it in the library. I'm guessing his college experience isn't going as planned
God doesn't care if you're a paramedic, you can't do that to someones cat and still get into heaven
Grandma is high again and locked herself in the house
Randomize
