I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
we were all standing in the kitchen taking shots and we look over at you and your face is in the plate of spaghetti you were eating.
We glued Jenga blocks together, called it "magic blocks" and sold it to the stoners for $50 and a bottle of Henny
I wonder if that one guy remembers you sticking salami to his forehead when he was passed out on new years eve.
it was like, one of those nights where you keep going back to the fridge because you just can't get full. except, with sex.
You drunk dialed me and told me to jump out of my second story window so I could give you head. I almost considered it.
Hillary is trying to make pickle pops with vodka and sell them to kids at the ball park.
There was a gay guy in drag passed out against the wall but we had sex in there anyway.
Just took a shot of tequila with a random guy at the supermarket. Happy cinco de fourth.
It has been so long since I got any action that I have decided to change my vagina's name from "the chamber of judgement" to "the cave of forgotten dreams".
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
We spent our last night together taking turns vomiting in the bathroom. I'd say it was a romantic trip.
It's nice doing the walk of shame at 530 am, the birds are chirping, campus is empty, and it's dark so noone can see who the Fuck you are
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
Randomize