Just woke up and stopped at the WaWa in Virginia. Had major morning wood and didn't try to hide it when walking around. So many awkward stares.
i just got the best bj of my life in the pastors office at church.. Youre right jesus really does love me.
trying to figure out who visited the hillshire farms website enough for it to be in my top sites.
Leaving the dealer's house. He just gave me a sincere hug and said good luck. This cant end well.
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
My only downfall is that I can only take shots in twos.
I just told him he had gained a new brother. He immediately knew I meant the eskimo kind.
You better keep a close eye on your uterus tonight cause I am looking good.
I ran into my parents house and stole a bottle of vodka last night...Apparently left them a note that read "DRUNK. TOOK VODKA. BRING MORE."
The shit I just took was four, very distinct colors. Jager night was a success
It's not really the holidays until I raid the medicine cabinet. Happy hydrocodone to me
And a merry methadone to all
I'm not going to pass up the opportunity to be half naked and covered in glitter without facing judgement or legal prosecution. I'll be there.
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
You're like my little fucked up version of the groundhog seeing its shadow, only it's boobs and warm weather.
Randomize
