Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
My mom just called and reminded me not to throw up in any cabs tonight. Happy St. Patty's Day.
Seeing a catheter being inserted into a penis severely diminished my sex life
After she came with my hands around her neck, she sat there for a minute and gave me the scuba diving sign for a-ok.
I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
I'm promising sexual favors in return for his responsible life decisions. Now THIS is growing up.
She dumped a fish bowl of alcohol on herself. Just like flash dance.
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
Well I woke up and my arm was bleeding. And my blood is on the wall in the hallway.
Umm
No idea. I blame fireball.
Valid.
Halfway through the night I was hiding in a trashcan. Then I "sobered" up and ran around the house throwing change because I wanted to make my last moments of 2013 charitable.
I'm disgusted with myself. I feel like I need 10 boxes of Summer's Eve and a baptism.
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
You kept licking my face. You said you were making sure I was real.
Also: that bruise on my leg where you left like 3 sets of teeth marks keeps getting run into the corners of desks and shit. And I can't even complain to anyone at work
send nudes
from the living room?
Randomize
