come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
I'm so glad you managed to take a picture of your foreskin before you broke my camera.
GUESS WHAT I JUST LICKED
I feel like half our conversations start this way.
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
I slept face down in the dirt because I wanted to go camping?
mom in a round about way told me to either donate my eggs or become a surrogate bcuz I need money.
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
I returned her cell phone that I found in the bathroom, I felt the stretcher and the ambulance was enough of a learning experience.
We have to have sex while I'm dressed as a tiger. It's one of my life goals
I have got to stop making out with redheads. I need to sign my life over to my dad like Britney Spears.
The last time I saw you, you were rolling around on the ground at the bar.....
.....well it was bound to be an interesting night since I was chasing my pulls with pulls....
Im laying on the couch wishing someone was here to pour wine in my mouth. I need an alcohol IV
I'm sorry if you weren't drunk enough to be peer pressured into the naked dancing/group make out that transpired last night
If sex isn’t mentioned at least three times at the dinner table, I’m not interested...
She super glued his penis to his testicles. And shaved off a good portion of his hair after he passed out at the party.
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