with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
I just tried to unlock my house with the car remote
You know how my eyes change color? Well I noticed after I hook up with someone my eyes are greener.
Wow, so you're like the Edward Cullen of sluts.
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
Found my new morning breakfast spot. Hospital cafeteria. Nobody asks questions, they just assume shit went downnn
heey were did you guys go? last time i remember seeing you i was throwing up in the fountain
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
I owe her a pancake or a second hand orgasm
Did you guys have sex yet? And don't worry, I broke the ice already by sending this to both of you. So you can just jump right into it. You're welcome.
I woke up in my living room, on the floor, wearing nothing but a fur coat?
My black heart of coal cannot compete with your boiling crock pot of teddy bears, rainbows, 90s music, and the good candy you get from rich people on Halloween.
his brother walked in while we were fucking on the couch, told me i had "lovely jugs" and offered to make both of us a drink
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
Spent tonight painting strippers in camo.
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
Randomize
