I wish you could order shots online.
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
You would be married by May if you put half as much energy into getting straight guys as you do into getting gay guys
STOP CALLING ME LADY CHLAMYDIA
Counseling BFF to break up with her BF. We will get that 3-way
yeah, i'm not. but i'm ready for free bjs. it's just hard to find women who will give me a beej while i'm sobbing uncontrollably
I hooked up with a lesbian tonite. Top 2 valentines experiences of all time.
Well its official, I'm into significantly freakier sex than even I thought possible.
Client visitor days are the worst. If I have to wear a tie and can be hungover at least have the decency to find some more attractive visitors
I was so high the sounds of a cricket drove me out of my home at 4am.... Boo that fucking cricket
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
I have a corndog on my dresser and a trashcan of puke. Thanks for a great night!
He just snapchatted me a blank snap that said "miss our sex" Vagina game too strong
I'm sure if Robin Williams was still with us he would want you to see boobs.
ya I went to the grocery store literally just for cheese and condoms
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