Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
Im handcuffed to some kid i hardly know. there are no cops involved
She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
She's mad at me cuz I told her having a fuck buddy was too much commitment.
I returned her cell phone that I found in the bathroom, I felt the stretcher and the ambulance was enough of a learning experience.
The really sad thing is that I actually practiced crawling in my room yesterday in preparation for today
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
Apparently I was so drunk I threw my entire wallet at the stripper on stage. That was the third time I should've gotten kicked out.
I ate 12 cupcakes in less than 24 hours, so no judgement here.
I'm going on a new diet. It's called the "eat healthy otherwise boys won't want to have sex with your fat ass" diet. Wish me luck.
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
I'm sure nobody at Walmart was wondering why I was wearing a glittery tutu and needed $300 changed into small bills
She kissed me, then said "mmm your face tastes like it needs my pussy on it."
Apparently my thong was thrown in the cornfield last night. No one will tell me why.
You went on the date? His pickup line was I swear I'm not a serial killer and you went on the date???
Randomize
