she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
sounds like you fell off the wagon.
fuck falling off. at this point, the wagon is a dot on the horizon.
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
I think he'd cut a tree down for me. He's from North Dakota. That's something hot guys do there, right?
just put an icicle in the bong. best/worst idea ever. i think i can taste global warming right now.
Blow job bear ended up in my bed last night. She didn't live up to her costume.
Maybe he meant to say like I love fucking you? But just forgot the fucking part.. That's what I'm telling myself.
Maybe if more guys knew my pillowtalk occasionally includes me scribbling notebook diagrams of cell signalling pathways, I'd get laid more often
Apparently I walked to Denny's in the pouring rain without shoes just socks last night. Excellent.
He was chasing Ciroc shots with sips of Captain Morgan... he didn't make it to midnight
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
To be fair I went my whole first week without showing up to work drunk!
It's 4am & this guy is asleep with his junk still inside me..really rethinking my life
Ever get that feeling that you're the back up booty call and half way through securing the fake date excuse to try to get in your pants, the guy hears back from the original booty call and drops the conversation with no explanation?
So. My mom went grocery shopping for me while I was at work & brought the food here. Cool bc my dildo was laying on the counter. Forgot I left it out. I am sure she saw. Im mortified.
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