Jesus people on campus asked me what i do for joy. I said i love sinning especially pre-marital sex.
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
I held his ankles while he hung off the top bunk attempting to get my pillow that fell off.
I feel like jumping into a breast pit right now. Like the old school ball pits at mcdonalds.
There's a middle eastern man wearing a cow costume with tequila coming out of his udders, but I'm not sober enough to feel uncomfortable with it.
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
She said she had a surprise for me and sent me a video of her having sex with some fat dude. It was a mood killer
Remember that time I hopped home naked from the bar, then tried to convince you I was ok to drive you home? Good call on the taxi.
don't worry about my dad. he just hates you because you're liberal, not because we're fucking.
Rule 1: If any of us dies on a trip, the other two have to 'Weekend at Bernies' the shit outta that corpse...
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
Just got my second shot
Baller. We’re going to be knee deep in strippers and coke in 10 days
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
Randomize
