i miss you so much
i miss you too
oops, did i send that to you? i meant to send it to the money you owe me
Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
they just dont make restraining orders like they used to.
Did your dad mention the fact that you asked him for viagra at 2 in the morning?
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
Someone asked me why we were having sex on the porch last night. All I remember is him saying he wanted the recruits to see. This has got to stop.
I don't even remember what he looks like. All I know is he's 6 foot 100. I like that.
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
I'm drinking with a guy who apparently blew my dog sitter.
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
Are you the reason I woke up without pants?
Right?? Give me some apple scented candles and I'm a fall wet dream
I just puked in a chili’s bathroom... happy birthday to me
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