if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
Just because its your birthday does not mean u can play quarters by dropping quarters into cups to make me drink.
she got into med school, i feel dumb for banging her dance major friend
the cab driver said that we weren't the worst shit show he'd ever seen, CHALLENGE ACCEPTED!!
You screamed "There's a potato in my anus" and proceeded to attempt to grind with the bouncer. Also, I'm pretty sure our Chem teacher was in the same bar as us.
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
I don't have time to shower before my passport photos...your cum is all over my hair...that's with me for 10 years now
Just because the energy drink is shaped like a grenade doesnt make it cool to throw it and yell "BOOM" and break my flatscreen, asshole
I'm going to get high and eat ice cream until the pain goes away. You're welcome to join.
You just accidentally called me. You kept saying "Really?! Really?!!" So I can only assume you are having sub par sex
Please tell me I didn't send you a dick pic in the middle of Peter Pan..
What're you gonna do with the rest of your night?
Probably watching cooking videos and fantasizing about pie
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