I can only date guys with blackberrys
I just decided its a new prereq to talk to me
found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
just tell him i said nine months
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
I wish I was that guy from the miller light commercials so I could walk into parties and take peoples beer without getting yelled at
Am i fat?
Well i wouldnt let you on top
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
I'm okay.. I had a good heart to heart with the cab driver Raheem - it's going to be our year.
The security guard popped his head over the mens room door and goes "nice tits- now get out." Deer in headlights moment right there.
Turns out lunch break sex with someone you cant stand being around for any amount of time just makes you wish you had gone to get tacos like you originally planed.
I just spent 10 min explaining to my mom how orange is a strange color. I think she knows
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
i wore a power symbol belly button ring just so i can drunkenly tell him that he turns me on. i dont care if it works i think its classy
Dude I just realized i did a camper walk of shame in front of amish people. I should have asked for cheese and a home made pie to cover it up. Im just lost shopping in amish country nothing to see here
this is a PSA to never have sex in a bed from ikea
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