i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
It was like what a highfive between zeus and Jesus would sound like
i don't think my life will be extraordinarily more meaningful if i let him put his tongue in my butthole.
Right now im sitting at home and all i can think about is im eating calories and i should be out drinking them.
He was sitting on the bathroom floor, swirling his finger in the toilet singing the Laguna Beach theme song. I don't know whether to laugh or help him.
If you ever get the opportunity, make fun of how small his dick is for me
I said "have a good day officer and I'll see you friday when I get arrested for being too drunk.."
I want a bunch of melted cheese. or a penis. or a penis covered in melted cheese
I'll be there soon. I expect Advil and a bucket of kittens when I arrive.
Rule number one to being a good adult: don't use your vagina as an icebreaker. Just some wisdom I thought I'd pass down from experience.
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
If you sleep with him I will stab you int the uterus with a pitchfork.
Prepare the pitchfork.
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
You're my best friend, so I'm kinda scared to say this, but.....I kinda feel odd when I show up with you at your family events and I have banged or blown at least 3 people in the room
if you want the landscaping job, the uniform is a speedo. no exceptions.
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